Research indicates that hearing your thoughts expressed aloud helps you to make better decisions. Photograph: Posed by model; simonapilolla/Getty Images View image in fullscreen Research indicates that hearing your thoughts expressed aloud helps you to make better decisions. Photograph: Posed by model; simonapilolla/Getty Images Opinion Health & wellbeing Is it so odd to talk to yourself? No one knows you better – or is better at keeping your secrets Polly Hudson I’ll happily chat to plants and pets, but when I really need to get something off my chest I’m my own best listener. And that’s absolutely fine, according to my new favourite expert
I n an arguably unnecessary attempt at myth-busting, a psychologist has revealed that talking to yourself can be a healthy sign that says positive things about your mental state. Violeta Acedo told Hello! magazine that it “improves focus, emotional health and decision-making” and, while it can be considered eccentric, is not in itself a symptom of mental illness. This struck me as odd, to say the least, like justifying breathing. Not only did I assume that everyone talks to themselves, but I also wouldn’t trust anybody who doesn’t because … what’s going on there, then? Even before I knew science was on my side, I would have died on this hill (while talking myself through potential options for memorable last words).
To be clear, this is not chatting to your plants or pets, because those are living things, so fall under the umbrella of ordinary conversation. Plants can thrive with verbal motivation and it’s only polite to acknowledge any animal you encounter, of course. No, this is you speaking to you, out loud and proud.
Perhaps it’s a reminder, a question or a pep talk. Maybe it’s a harsh truth that would have stung delivered from any other source. It could be simply shooting the breeze, to while away a boring moment. Now and then it will be a joke you wish someone else had been around to hear. It all counts.
Acedo explains that talking to yourself can be “a tool to reflect, get organised or regulate your emotions”. Disappointingly, she says those of us who do it aren’t necessarily more intelligent, but it can “be a useful strategy for functioning better”. I’ll take that.
She goes on to list the benefits, including how saying “First I’ll do this, then that,” or “Where have I left my keys?” helps direct attention to our priorities and goals. Cynics may want to dismiss this as woo-woo verging dangerously close to manifesting, but studies have shown that saying the name of an item you’re looking for out loud may make it easier to find as it focuses the brain.
Research also indicates that a tête-à-tête avec toi-même can mean you make better decisions, too, because you gain a unique perspective on your thoughts from hearing them aloud, and evaluate them differently as a result.
But never mind the academic evidence. The bombshell that many people don’t talk to themselves is almost as upsetting as the revelation that some don’t have an internal monologue yapping away in their heads , only the sound you hear when you put a seashell to your ear, or something. What are these strong silent types doing when they are alone? Just going about their business in total peace and quiet? If they want to explore a theory or sound out a plan, they must have to wait until they can get somebody else involved, rather than striking while the iron is hot. There’s no freedom quite like saying something to yourself: if i…